I have the Apollo real bad.
The Apollo? You ask.
Hush please; quiet your voice…its bad, real bad.
It blurs your vision.
It’s highly contagious.
It’s… conjunctivitis (you might call it…pink eye).
It was mid-July 1969. All was right with America. Children played in the streets. Neighbors conversed gaily with one another. Doors were left unlocked. Cats and dogs were friends. America was the place to be. Gas was cheap. Politicians were honest. NASA was sending Apollo 11 to the moon.
Senegal. Same time. Different story. Mass chaos had broken out all over the streets of Dakar practically overnight. Cab drivers with blurred vision were rear-ending each other. Chefs were misreading their recipes. People were tying up their horses in front of the wrong shanties. Neighbors were killing each other’s chickens for dinner. What was wrong? They had IT. Yes, IT I say….the red, the irritating, the blurred vision. IT was here. Everyone’s eyes were infected. No work could be done! What else could it be, but the Apollo?
At the exact time that Dakar had an outbreak of what Americans call pink eye, Apollo 11 was landing on the moon. Coincidence? Think again. What else could explain it? Senegalese with puffy itchy eyes. Americans sending space shuttles to the moon. The connection is obvious. Apollo caused the outbreak and is now appropriately named.
One small moon landing for America, one big eye infection for Senegal.
Disclaimer: the aforementioned farce may have been exaggerated for our mutual satisfaction. However, the underlying truth remains, Senegalese point to Apollo 11 as the root cause of pink eye. Are your eyes itching yet?